Thursday, April 24, 2014 00:39

Zombie Slayer Fights Trailer Park Zombies

Zombie Slayer Returns to Fight Trailer Park Zombies

It was a sunny day and Skull Crusher the Zombie Slayer was out wandering aimlessly. He enjoyed feeling the warm sun on his face.

The zombie slayer was not paying attention to where he was wandering. Actually, he did not even care. He was in a good mood and felt like he could win the Zombie War single-handed. The zombie slayer had met a girl in town named Victoria and all he could think about was her.

After a few hours of directionless wandering, he heard a scream. His brief vacation was over. It was time to get back into zombie slayer mode. Skull Crusher looked around. His morning walk had landed him in a rundown trailer park.

Zombie Slayer GirlA young woman was about 50 yards away from him at the end of the line of trailers. She started running toward him. Her long blond hair flowed behind her, as was the nightgown she was wearing. Her face was muddy and tears streaked down her cheeks. It would seem that she had been crying. Two men came charging behind the woman and it was quite apparent that they were zombie virus infected trailer park zombies.

The trailer park zombies were dressed in dirty blue jean coveralls with no shirts underneath. Other than the coveralls, the trailer park zombies were wearing dirty, old work boots. They too had muddy faces and greasy hair.

Skull Crusher must have looked presentable because the girl was obviously expecting his help escaping from the trailer park zombies. It was quite a while since he had met a lone zombie war survivor. Too bad his face was muddy as well. His face was muddy more often than not. Upholding the reputation of the best zombie slayer is a dirty business.

She ran up to him and said, “Help!”

He was already in the mood to stomp some trailer park zombies butt.

If he happened to look like a hero to this damsel in distress, so be it.

The zombie slayer walked past the girl in his baseball batters stance. He had his machete in hand and was looking for a clean swipe on the first one. His plan was to take out the first of the trailer park zombies then have some fun with the other.

Skull Crusher closed the gap, stepped forward, and took a full swing. The first of the trailer park zombies was instantly separated from its head. The zombie slayer made a flawless decapitation. In fact, he could not recall a better opening to a fight.

The second of the trailer park zombies was running carelessly and as Skull Crusher stepped past it, the zombie tripped over the now headless corpse at its feet.

Trailer Park ZombiesThe zombie slayer noticed out of the corner of his eye that the girl was kneeling and rummaging through her backpack. He also noticed how toned and in shape she was. She did not strike him as a helpless screamer. In fact, she looked a bit familiar.

She stood up, pulled a .44 Magnum large bore handgun out of her backpack, and aimed it at him.

He stared down the large, dark barrel and cursed himself for falling for the damsel in distress act. With all of the bloodthirsty cannibal zombies like the trailer park zombies that he had dispatched, his career was about to be ended with his head unceremoniously blasted off his shoulders by a little blonde with a hand cannon.

The girl closed one eye, took aim, and fired. The kickback nearly took her off her feet. The slug whizzed by Skull Crushers head and blew out the back of the trailer park zombies head that was creeping up behind him. The zombie sunk to the ground. Skull Crusher had forgotten about the second zombie.

“Victoria?” he asked the girl.

She winked at him. He had not recognized her because of the blonde hair. Victoria Delasante was the mayor’s daughter and the hottest girl in town.

“I’ve been trying to get you alone,” she said

Victoria stepped up to him, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him on the lips. Skull Crusher was completely stunned.

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